Piano

I just wanted people to know that my wrists hurt like hell from playing Piano.


Sincerely,
Zack.

I Am Back

So I decided to come back and write.


On my lap I have my fat Mini Dachshund Doggy.


But anyways.


I have been working on Firefly. And it is the most difficult piece of music I have ever written. I am going to use my Computer to help write it, because I have the Melody but the Chords to me are iffy in certain parts, and plus this way will save me weeks of Writing Time.


But, really, I think I fixed up my life to a point where it is workable. It is funny how things seem to work itself out little by little, one by one. I think you find in life that when something good comes along you can take and give to much to it, love it and use it too much, but that doesn't mean you can't do it again, but better, you know?


I will end with a Poem, I guess.

Walk to me,
walk from me,

I can remember,
so can you,
I assume now,
time is nothing,
let me sleep,
one more minute.

Don't judge the Poem, it sucks, I think I lost my talent...

I have a million people to apologize to...

Well, me and Melissa and Mary... Aren't friends. I pushed it too far. I never had 'friends' of that manner. You know what I mean?
I honestly wish I could have them back. Like, you don't even know how bad.
I guess I will start with Mary. No words can explain how bad I feel. I have treated her SO BAD. And, I know that. And, I lashed out at her recently. I can't believe I did that. I have a horrible guilt inside. Look, I still want to be her friend. Crazy, right? Well... Yeah. I just want to stand in front of her, and cry, and beg for forgiveness. I have so much to say I am sorry about as in:
Calling her 'babe,' 'sweetheart,' 'sweety,' and some other things. I have to say sorry for insulting her and making her feel bad. For being... Clingy. For caring too much. I still care about her. I forgave her a long time ago, but, I haven't been forgiven. And, that is fine if she doesn't. But, I need her to hear me out. I am sorry Mary.


And, Melissa. I was too clingy. I did some things because I was upset with her. I was looking forward to something. Something I really wanted to do. Now I will get that song dedicated to the love birds. Oh well... Here is a little apology... Not enough though:
I am sorry for being clingy. I am sorry Melissa, for doing those stupid things. For loving you, I suppose. For everything I did wrong. For criticizing you. For doing it all wrong. I am sorry.



I am sorry. I swear. I promise. I wouldn't lie about this. I swear.


-Zack.

Wow... I am freaked out...

I have letters claiming to be plans of me being attacked... freaked out... I know who they are from, somebody i know, a few actually. and i got them from a friend... wow... attacked me and now this.

I am speaking up. I am laying it all down on that thin rigid line.

I don't do drugs. Never did Acid, never shot up Heroin, never snorted Cocaine, never puffed Marijuana. Never did it. Never abused my medication. I also never drank alcohol. No Whiskey, no Wine. Nothing. I am not Jim Morrison.
People said me saying this means I care too much, but it is true. But, guess what. I don't care what a damn person thinks right now. I want to go into a little white room, sit down in a damn chair, and has everyone of those freaks there watching. I want blood drawn, I want people hear I don't do drugs. And, they can all laugh at me once I cry like hell because I am so afraid of needles. They are one of the scariest things in the world to me. And, Pain is fine, Physically, but Emotionally. I am not going to take it anymore.
And, to every damn person who keeps saying and asking me about like Melissa. Get the hell of my back goddammit, I told you, and I am not going to tell you again Jesus Christ, I do not have feelings for Melissa. And, if you don't believe me, just look me in the eyes, and I will say straight to you. NO lies.


So, until I feel better, emotionally, personally. I guess I am not going to take another damn thing that comes towards me. You can take a damn hike if you do have something to say. So, go to Hell.


Sincerely,
Your one and only Love, Zack...

I Am Sorry Melissa

I screwed up badly... Melissa... I befriended her, I guess. But, to tell the truth I really want her back as a friend. Just someone to talk to. I don't know if that will be possible. I hope it will be.
Melissa, you were right about everything. You were. And, you don't need to ever talk to me again. But I need to tell you I am so sorry. Really. I am sick of listening to "Melissa" to make me feel better. I need to talk to you. Because you make me feel better. You are my favorite person to talk to. I swear.
I hope you forgive me Melissa. And, if you don't. That is fine... I will just miss out on being your friend...



Sorry,
Zack.

Melissa, I wish you were real...

Melissa, the song, is what I am listening to. I wish this Melissa was real. I know one. Or I did. Then, I found out I was being used. Not a big surprise. I wish I had somebody real.